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"'Am I your boyfriend?' is the kind of question a nine-year-old asks another nine-year-old. It had no place in a sophisticated relationship. I knew the rules -- I was meant to be cool and relaxed, laid-back and casual. At first maybe we'd 'see' each other (which meant that she'd still 'see' other people), then maybe we'd date (which would mean that she wouldn't see other people even though she might want to), and then finally we'd be boyfriend and girlfriend (by which time she wouldn't want to see other people because she'd be happy with me)." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"It's easy to feel that everyday love isn't like the love in the movies because successions of the mind-numbingly dismal, modern romantic comedies -- stand up French kiss, sleepless in Seattle, and While You Were Sleeping -- have succeeded in turning everything that's wonderful about love into cheese. People are too literal about love now and it's all because, thanks to these films, there's little space left for symbolism in real life." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'everybody loves a lover but too many people lack Staying Power. Love should be fatal. You should never recover from it. If you can then it wasn't love.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'in my opinion, you can only say that love truly is love once you're both dead, because it's only then, once you've managed to go your entire lives with each other and there's nowhere for you to go off to or anyone to go off with, that it finally becomes real. Anything else is more or less just infatuation.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"Over the following years i fell in love with her several times but never felt compelled to tell her, there was no reason to -- she never seemed the slightest bit interested in being anything more than friends." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'I think the right person's out there for everyone, but you can only see them if you want to see them.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'everything about love is random,' said Kate calmly.' So why try and bring order to it? It's not worth worrying about. I know we could just move in together and that would make everything much easier, but it works both ways. It's easier to walk out, it's easier to be unfaithful, it's easier for everything to just disappear. If I'm going to invest my emotions in another human being again, then I'm going to make sure if it doesn't work out it'll be the messiest, most savage divorce ever.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'Names are irrelevant. They're just labels. I mean, how can you tell what a child should be called before they've even had a chance to do anything?'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'Between grief and nothing, which would you choose?'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"Is love really love if only one of you believes in it?" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'you might love her, but what about the fact that she doesn't love you? Is love really love if only one person stays true to the cause?'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'I'd like the kind of love that lasts forever. It doesn't matter if it's plain, it doesn't matter if it's ugly. It just has to be there.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"My sole aim in life was to find a girlfriend who would make me feel so secure that I'd never have to worry about relationships again. But it was always my fault that it never worked out with the girls I dated. I always underestimated the depths of my insecurity. It had nothing to do with poor self-image -- I actually considered myself quite a catch-- the problem was, I never trusted the women I was involved with to tell the Truth, because the Truth never changes but, as I knew so well, people did. I knew it wasn't everyone, some women did have Staying Power, but it was so impossible to tell which ones they were. Women should come labeled -- it would make life so much more simpler." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'I've never understood why people insist on saying things like, 'there's plenty of other finish in the sea.' My mum actually said that to me, you know, after I was dumped by the person formerly known as 'my boyfriend.' There's me crying my heart out and all she was offering me by way of consolation was a fish metaphor.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"I wasn't going to take life lying down anymore. Nothing was going to stop me from doing all the things I talked about doing but always found an excuse for never bringing to fruition. For the last three years I'd been living in a state of limbo. I'd been going to the same places, hanging out with the same people, listening to the same music." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'I think that your ex has confused you so much that you don't know whether you're coming or going. Sometimes when you're the partner that has been left, you find it hard to get on with life. You ask yourself the question, 'why aren't they hurting as much as I am?' It's not unusual for people in this situation to see hope in the relationship when there is none.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"Time was always NOW, in big, bold, uppercase letters. The future just wasn't my concern." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"I hadn't thought about what I wanted to do, in any serious manner, for such a long time that the answer didn't come quite as speedily as I felt it should have." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"I had no problem with being left alone with strange adults and a bunch of children I didn't know. If my parents were trying to give me a head start on the advancement of my social skills, then they should have asked me and I could have told them that I got along with everyone." - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

"'sometimes I'm so boring even I stop listening.'" - My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle